Below is my first attempt at blogging about being a cuckold. It runs from 11/01 to 12/02. Not very long but still interesting to read. It is from the latest to earliest in terms of order. Probably best to start reading from the bottom up.
I hope to fix the broken links and clean it further.
cuckold husband thoughts and desires
Saturday, December 07, 2002
( 6:21 PM ) Tim
i am falling very behind in updating what has been going on in my life. Let me just put down the highlights so that i can maybe go back and write more.
Samantha fisted a woman last night.
THE BIG NEWS:i got to fuck my wife today for the first time in 421 days. She also sucked my little cock for a while. The "kicker" is that she and i were broadcasting on the webcam, putting on a show for 5-6 men. i didn't cum, though i could have within a couple of minutes of fucking her. i would have to pull out of her sweet pussy after only a few thrusts to keep from cumming.
Therefore i have reset the clock. i hope i don't have to wait another 421 days, but i will if required. #
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Friday, December 06, 2002
( 8:06 AM ) Tim
my wife was fucked yesterday multiple times by different men through out the day. More details to follow (sorry no pics). The cock size of the men was:
Man #1: about 6" and thick
Man #2: 8 1/2" and thick #
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Thursday, December 05, 2002
( 1:16 PM ) Tim
When it rains, it pours!!!
my wife is going to meet a 24 year old man this afternoon at a hotel. She has never been fucked by him, but her slut partner in crime (girlfriend) has and recommend him to my wife. Hopefully she will get fucked long and hard as she wants and needs. She has desperate and horny enough last night that she was even going to allow me to fuck her last night but i stupidly said "No" as i explained below.
To show what a "slut" my wife is, she is planning to invite a different man over to the same room later tonight to get fucked by him after the first man leaves. The sound of her voice just rings with the sexual excitement and desire that she is feeling.
She is wearing the same outfit that she wore last night, her grey striped "school girlish" short dress with white cuffed ankle socks. i did suggest (and i think she is going to take me up on it) that she take the digital camera. i can't wait to view the pics. If possible i will share some pics with the readers.
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( 8:45 AM ) Tim
What little time i had to chat with my wife, it seems like last night was a bust. She said the man just couldn't keep his cock hard. She tried and tried.
He was 40 years old so this experience has re-confirmed to my wife why she loves younger men, rarely do they have a problem of keeping their cocks hard.
i don't know if he was able to fuck my wife or not. For sure she was sexual so the "dry spell" has ended.
She also told me that when she got home around 3 am (she didn't stay all night because of the above issue), she rubbed my butt and asked me if i wanted some... according to her, i said "No"
i do not remember that at all but that doesn't surprise. i tend to be able to have conversations while i am half asleep and never remember them. Getting to fuck my wife last night would have been a great thing... my little cock would have loved it, but i guess my brain was not up for it at 3 am.
Damn brain!!! #
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Wednesday, December 04, 2002
( 10:29 PM ) Tim
No picture... the camera batteries were dead and she wouldn't wait for me to change them. Below is a Yahoo messenger session that i just had with somebody that i chat with:
chat_friend: Hello Good evening how have you been
cuckoldhusband: doing great
chat_friend: thats good to hear
chat_friend: anymore movies of her
cuckoldhusband: no, she just left though to go get fucked and she allowed me to take a pic, but the damn camera's batteries were dead
chat_friend: lol
chat_friend: too bad
cuckoldhusband: yeah, little depressed about it
cuckoldhusband: wanted a pic bad, she looked very cute and sexy
chat_friend: i can imagine
chat_friend: do you have any new pics of her for me
cuckoldhusband: no, tonight would have been the first new ones in quite a while
chat_friend: ok
cuckoldhusband: she left wearing a short grey striped dress with white cuff ankle socks
chat_friend: nice
cuckoldhusband: soon she will be nude except for her socks... being fucked all night long
cuckoldhusband: sucking his cock, pleasuring him with her hot body
cuckoldhusband: while i am at home, stroking my little cock
cuckoldhusband: just imaging what that must feel like
chat_friend: well thats how it goes
cuckoldhusband: yeah i know... it is pretty obvious when i am nude when she left, my little cock not even hard, wearing sissy feminine socks
cuckoldhusband: begging her to wait a minute so i can change the batteries in the camera...but she has a real man with a real cock waiting to fuck her pussy
cuckoldhusband: acting very desperate while the man that will be fucking her tonight is probably sitting at home feeling very confident
cuckoldhusband: just waiting for my wife to arrive
cuckoldhusband: while i can't stop stroking my little cock #
( 9:55 PM ) Tim
The dry spell is going to end tonight. Samantha is upstairs as i type this posting, bathing, shaving her pussy to be nice and smooth, getting ready to go meet a man that has fucked her previously (over a year ago). She has told me that she will not be coming home tonight because his roommate is not home. She will be up all night getting fucked.
i also asked her what she was going to wear. She said a short flirty type dress. i then asked if she planned on wearing socks. Her answer "Yes, of course". my little cock got hard just thinking about that.
i hope that she will allow me to take a picture of her prior to leaving tonight. If so, i will share the picture with everybody tomorrow. #
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Tuesday, December 03, 2002
( 9:48 AM ) Tim
Still very quiet on the "fucking front" with my wife. What is the saying "It is always the quietest before the storm". It has been 3 weeks since she was fucked last.
She and i have been talking about Christmas. She asked me what i wanted for Christmas. i thought about it for a little bit and answered "You".
She just smiled. Maybe i will get to fuck my hot cute wife in a few weeks or maybe she was smiling because she knew she was going to continue to keep me denied. #
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Sunday, December 01, 2002
( 11:24 AM ) Tim
A quick update: my wife has not been fucked now for about 3 weeks, it will have been 3 weeks Sunday night. It has been a combination of her being sick as well as her "monthly visitor". #
( 11:22 AM ) Tim
my wife and i have been to a couple of movies this weekend. It doesn't matter what the movies were though. Before one of the movies started, i was feeling "randy" and "horny" and joked with her that she should stroke my little cock... and then i got a surprised.
She told me that she had already done that with a man recently. She had pulled this man's cock out of his pants and stroked and teased it all during the movie. Making him squirm as he tried not to cum. Samantha told me she would have made him cum except she couldn't figure out how to dispose of his cum.
Needless to say, my little cock stayed within my panties during the movie. Leaving me once again to dream about what it must like to be a real man instead of a cuckold sissy with a little cock.
Tuesday, November 26, 2002
( 1:08 PM ) Tim
According to a survey released Monday by condom manufacturer Durex:
Average number of times in the U.S. that a couple will have sex: 138 times a year or roughly 2 or 3 times a week.
According to my cuckold lifestyle:
Average number of times that i have gotten to have sex: 0 times in a year. #
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Monday, November 25, 2002
( 9:02 AM ) Tim
October 14, 2001
i don't know if this is the exact date but it is the only date that i can find. What date you ask am i talking about?
The date that i last got to fuck my wife. The date is October 14, 2001. It has been 407 days since i last got to slide my little 4.5" cock into my wife's wet pussy. i wish i could remember details about that night. At the time i never expected that it would be my last time for such a long time to fuck my own wife.
Are you happy about not getting to fuck your wife in 407 days?
No, i still would love to fuck her each and every day.
Are you sad or upset that you haven't gotten to fuck your wife in 407 days?
No, i am not sad or upset either.
How do you feel you?
i feel great that she is able to be sexually pleased and satisfied as she deserves. i get sexually excited just knowing that fact. Knowing that my wife is able to get fucked hard to orgasm on a regular basis. Knowing that she gets sexually excited when she is on "the hunt" for a man. Knowing that she will be on her back, her legs in the air, orgasming as another man is fucking her.
What about your own sexual satisfaction?
Sexual satisfaction for me is to stroke my little cock almost daily. i try not to cum that often, maybe once every two weeks. i enjoy feeling horny. When i do orgasms, they are felt when i am on my back, my legs slightly bent, my left hand wrapped around my little cock. Stroking my cock as i think about my wife.
Picturing my wife on her back, her legs in the air, with another man’s cock in her wet pussy. His cock pistoning in and out of her pussy over and over, my wife’s body being pleasured by his cock. Remembering the sounds that i have heard her make in person and on video as she is getting fucked, the moaning, the panting, the words “fuck me, oh god, fuck me”, “oh god, I am cummmmmning!”
My left hand stroking my little cock over and over, feeling my pre-cum get spread around the head of my cock. My body wanting to cum and to cum hard, just like my wife’s body does when she is getting fucked.
There is a big difference between when i cum and when the man orgasms while fucking my wife. When i cum, it is into a sissy feminine sock that I place over my little cock as I masturbate. i feel my cock thru the sock spasm and spurt my cum. When the man orgasms, his cock (wearing a condom) is inside of my wife, feeling the heat of her pussy, hearing the sound her wet pussy makes. Seeing and feeling my wife’s body cum around his cock as he orgasms into the condom.
Something that I haven’t felt in 407 days… #
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Sunday, November 24, 2002
( 9:36 AM ) Tim
Things have been quiet this weekend. Samantha is still not feeling well. i have spent the weekend getting familiar with CSS (cascading style sheets). Yeah, i tend to be a geek. my goal was to try to get the web pages that i created to be similiar in look to the pages of my blog / diary.
Samantha did make comments about not going out for two weeks in a row. i wouldn't be surprised that in the next week that she will be going at least a couple of times. She is really hoping to get back together with the last man to fuck her. She had a very good time with him. The man has stated that he is willing to take pictures for me the next time they get together to fuck. Hopefully he remembers, i would love to see.
Wednesday, November 20, 2002
( 6:48 AM ) Tim
Quick update: my wife and i both have been sick for the last week or so. She has not gotten fucked now for a week and half. i haven't masturbated in that period of time either. #
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Monday, November 18, 2002
( 8:10 AM ) Tim
Last night i was able to participate in what i call a cuckold sexual encounter. my wife and i went to watch the new "Harry Potter" movie. She was wearing a short skirt, a Potter jersey type shirt, and a pair of cute white ankle socks. She looked very cute and sexy.
During the movie i was allowed to place my hand on her silky smooth thighs. my little cock got hard just touching my wife's skin.
Being a cuckold has taught me to appreciate the little sexual encounters with my wife. i don't get to have the grandiose encounters of being sexual with her for an hour or more. The grandiose encounter of feeling my cock in her pussy. Instead i get it in small 10 minute increments. The slight touch of her thigh during a movie. The caressing of her back while she is on the phone with a man.
i guess you can say the size of my sexual encounters are in proportion to the size of my cock.
Friday, November 15, 2002
( 2:17 PM ) Tim
Quick update: Even though i have been asking directly, other times implying it, other times joking about it, i have not yet gotten the pleasure of licking my wife's pussy. i do really want to lick her pussy daily for her.
Wish me luck as i continue to strive for her pussy. :) #
( 10:58 AM ) Tim
my wife and i had a great talk over the weekend. i am not going to be able to write about the entire conversation in a single day, but i wanted to cover a couple of things.
The first thing is that my wife for the very first time was willing to admit to me that my cock is on the small side. i knew it, i knew that she knew it, but she had never said it because she felt she would hurt me. She would always tell me that i was average. Because of our very light, airy, and open conversation, we now both are telling the truth about my little cock as well as my lack of sexual skills in bed.
During the conversation, i was able to explain because of my lack of skills and size, that i don't need to have intercourse with her, though i would love to if she wants to give me the opportunity. i do want to feel sexual though. One way is to be more involved in her sexuality, either be watching, being told about her encounters, or having her attention even if it was to keep me in chastity and in denial. i basically need to have sexuality attention, not sexual activitiy.
She and i discussed a possible chastity "game" for us to play. i have a CB2000, that i have been required to wear before. The longest was 21 days with a half hour out of it each day to shower and shave. My Master (at the time) required that. This game would be based on my wife's sexuality.
The idea is that once i am allowed to cum (how i cum is Samantha's decision), we would start counting the number of times that she gets fucked for the next week. To also bring in a touch of more randomness, a roll of the dice would be used. The number of days that i would be required to wear my CB2000 until i got another opportunity to cum, would be determined by # of times my wife was fucked X the roll of the dice.
For example: i get to cum by masturbation on Friday while my wife watches in amusement. i am then locked back up in the CB2000 while the week of counting the number of times my wife gets fucked starts. So if some reason she doesn't enjoy herself with another man during the week, i will be default be locked in chastity for a week.
During the week she proceededs to have a couple of dates. The first man proceeds to enjoy himself by fucking my wife's pussy twice in a single night. The second date is with the man that she enjoys making porn video's with. He proceeds to fuck my wife twice as well as a friend of his also fucks my wife twice. All told for the week, my wife has been fucked for a total of 6 times.
At the end of the week, she rolls a dice in front of me. The dice lands on 4. i will be required to wear my chastity device for another 24 days before i will be given the opportunity to get hard and orgasm again. 24 days to be able to try to convince my wife by my actions towards her to maybe allow me to fuck her to have my orgasm, or to be given head, or even a handjob. 24 days to pamper her, to make dinner for her, to do her laundry, to do whatever she wants in hopes of winning some sexual favors. i would hate to go 24 days in chastity just to masturbate my little cock. But if that is her decision, i will gladly masturbate.
i am not sure when she and i will start my chastity. i have been wearing my CB2000 every night when i get home until i shower in the morning. i plan to try not to cum until the game starts. As always, i would love to hear from anybody on comments or suggestions about this post. Please send an email to streaker96@hotmail.com #
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Wednesday, November 13, 2002
( 11:12 PM ) Tim
Here is a 19 second mpeg from the video that i personally took when my wife was fucked by the black man (the second man that i got to watch fuck my wife). i make a brief personal appearance by moving into the frame to get a picture. :) Also if you look quickly towards the end, you will see that i am locked in my CB2000 as well. Enjoy!!
my hot wife in action again #
( 3:20 PM ) Tim
Here is a very short mpeg from the videos. Enjoy!!!
my hot wife's porno #
( 1:05 PM ) Tim
i have been sick for the last 4 days. i couldn't sleep at all Monday night. Instead of sleeping, i spent all morning viewing the two videos that my wife had made on Halloween 2001 with a regular of hers and his friends.
Video of my wife on her back, a masked nude man with a big cock between her legs. i got to watch her face change with pleasures as his cock slide into her pussy. my wife's legs were being pushed back towards her breast, making her pussy that more accessable as the man pumped her over and over. Hearing my wife moan as he fucks her. The man "hamming it up" to the camera and the camera man. While my wife writhes with pleasure to his cock. Telling my wife to cum on his cock. Seeing her face and chest turn red as she orgasms.
By the way, my wife does get fucked by the camera man as well eventually.
Over 4 hours of video of my hot wife pleasuring different men by sucking their cocks and getting fucked by them. On the two video tape, she is fucked by 5 different men. Last weekend, i found out that there is actually a third tape that i haven't gotten to see. i can't wait to watch it.
It was a very surreal experience watching the video tapes again while being sleep deprived. my left hand wrapped around my little 4.5" hard cock, stroking it. Watching the woman that i love, the woman that i want to spend the rest of my life with, enjoying herself by getting fucked by other men. Being so tired, but unable to sleep, being so horny from stroking myself, but not allowing myself to cum, made the morning feel like a magical dream. :) #
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Tuesday, November 12, 2002
( 5:44 AM ) Tim
i have started to find good information about how to perform oral sex (cunnilingus). i really want to be able to sexually please Samantha with my mouth on her beautiful pussy. i want to have her body writh, pressing her pussy hard against my mouth as she orgasms. i do plan to lick my own cum out of her pussy whenever i get an opportunity to fuck her.
Oral Sex Guides from About.com #
( 4:01 AM ) Tim
In the last week, my wife has been fucked by 3 different men. #
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Monday, November 11, 2002
( 3:40 PM ) Tim
i did get some details from Samantha this afternoon. Her date last night went very well. He is a very nice guy, tall, good looking, with Sam's estimate of about 7.5" cock. Sam had been chatting with this man for about a year and a half. According to her, he was well worth the wait. He had her falling off the bed while licking her pussy to orgasms.
The other thing is that when i called her to just check in with her, she was nude on his bed, wearing nothing but her socks. She spent the night with her legs up in the air wearing socks while he was fucking her. The only thing that stopped him from fucking my wife the third time was that he had an early meeting. Samantha spent the rest of the day complaining about how sore her thighs were, from having to hold her legs up in the air for so long while he was fucking her.
Samantha really enjoyed talking about her night with him. i loved hearing about it. my little cock made it clear that i enjoyed it by getting as large as it possible can. The man has stated that he is willing to take pictures for me the next time they get together. i can't wait to see what she brings home.
Samantha is really looking forward to feeling his cock slide into her pussy again soon. #
( 3:20 AM ) Tim
Samantha went on a date tonight. Wearing a short dress and a pair of white socks. i hope to get more details tomorrow.
FYI: Samantha's Yahoo IM is kissmyhottpink. #
Friday, November 08, 2002
( 9:24 AM ) Tim
If a viewer of the site, either a cuckold, a wife, or a man that fucks other men's wives would like to write something for addition to my blog, let me know. Send me an email at streaker96@hotmail.com
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Thursday, November 07, 2002
( 9:31 AM ) Tim
i find myself desiring to shave my legs. my pubic hair has been completely shaven for at least the last two years.
i can remember the first time that Samantha trimmed my pubic hair. i freaked out and was quite bothered by it. All that she did was shorten my pubic hair and i struggled with it. i can remember feeling that my manhood was impacted by my shortened pubic hair.
Eventually i served a Master and Mistress via online and they required that i shave my pubic hair. My current Master (Master Oak) also require that my pubic area is shaven. i shaved my pubic hair for them, enjoying the taboo-ness of being told to do it and just not having any pubic hair.
i have gotten to the point that i don't like having pubic hair. Whether i am serving or not, i would keep my pubic hair shaven.
Master Oak has required that i shave my legs as well. my legs have been bare twice now in the last year and a half. i am currently on a small break from actively serving my Master and my leg hair has grown back. i find myself thinking more and more about shaving my legs. i still struggle with the idea because shaving my legs will be noticed out in public. my lack of pubic hair is not obviously noticable.
i find myself looking at other men's legs when out in public. Not in a sexual way but just to see if they have hair. i have yet to see a man without any leg hair.
i did have an experience where i went to a local sandwich shop wearing shorts and a pair of blue sissy feminine socks that my Master requires me to wear. i was standing in line, with my bare legs exposed and a pair of socks that would cause individuals to look at my legs. i found the experience humiliating and sexually exciting. i think that experience is what is pushing me to shave my legs again.
Having shaved legs and wearing sissy feminine socks does continue to push me further away from being seen as a man, a man that women will enjoy getting fucked by and that includes my wife. But that seems to be my place in life. #
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Wednesday, November 06, 2002
( 8:04 AM ) Tim
Samantha and i have agreed on a set of rules and strategies for her safety when she is going out to get fucked.
Rules for men that she was already meet:
- the use of condoms when she gets fucked are required unless she and i have talked about it. They are not required when she is sucking cock.
- i need to know where she is and to be able to reach her via her cell phone if necessary.
- she and i will agree on a possible time for her to be home and she will call me if that time changes.
Rules for men that she is meeting for the first time:
- all initial meetings in person must be done in a public place, such as a coffee house.
- she will provide me with information about the man, such as full name, home address, and phone number. Since she is taking a risk, providing this information helps to alleviate the risk for her and in a way forces the man to take a risk himself by providing personal information.
Safe places that she can meet men are:
- local swingers club, she is free to go to local swingers club to meet men and to get fucked by them. She will make sure to get escorted to her car after the night is over.
- local sex clubs, such as Power Exchange in San Francisco.
Swinger and Sex Clubs will typically have security as well as my wife will be around people that she is both familiar with and friends. If she is feeling threatened, she will be able to get help. The BDSM and Swingers lifestyle tends to have very safety conscious individuals in it. People that are dangerous and not safe tend to find themself pushed out of the lifestyle.
My wife has had a few bad experiences in the last 4 years but the above strategy has allowed herself to get out of them in a safe way.
This is my first attempt at writing about how the strategy and rules for when my wife meets men. i am hoping to continue to add and make improvements as necessary. i would love to discuss any questions, ideas, concerns, or if something just isn't making sense. You can email me at streaker96@hotmail.com
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Tuesday, November 05, 2002
( 10:51 AM ) Tim
i am going to start trying to get my wife to allow me to lick her pussy daily. i really want to learn how to be a good pussy eater for her. i know that my little 4.5" cock is not ever going to be able to please her. Please wish me luck!! #
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Monday, November 04, 2002
( 1:36 PM ) Tim
my sexy wife spent the night with a former 26 year old regular. i am sure she loved feeling his cock inside of her shaven pussy again. From the pictures that i have gotten to see, he is roughly twice as big as me. Samantha loves to get fucked by 9" cocks. That seems to be her favorite size.
She left the house wearing her San Jose Sharks jersey, a pair of shorts, and a cute pair of socks. i have a huge sock fetish, i love to see women in socks, and Samantha knows this. i don't know if she does this on purpose or not but she tends not to wear socks when she is around me, but seems to almost always leave the house on a date wearing a pair. It drives me insane knowing that she will be on her back, having another man's cock slide into her pussy, with her socked feet in the air.
Here is some pictures that my wife brought home from over a year ago of this man and his cock:
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Sunday, November 03, 2002
( 6:44 PM ) Tim
i hope to use this site to document my thoughts and desires around being a cuckold to my beautiful wife. #
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